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Oh and about that dress....

Dinner tonight is mixed nuts and frontinac. Mmmm! Yummy too.

I survived this week at work, just barely. Finally my team leader has decided to be super supportive and has been giving me a lot of off the phone work. It has helped, some.

I don't really think I need to tell most of you this, but the answer to my problem isn't really as simple as finding another job. I wish it was, but I don't plan on living here forever and I am on workcover. It is complicated. End of story. I will work where I do until I move. I will take each day as it comes. And of course I will bitch about it here, because I can.

I also can't simply turn on and off my emotions by telling myself I should be positive. It would be terrific if it worked that way, but because I am human I will continue feeling the way I do until something actually changes inside me.

There have been a few changes. Most of them are good. I have lost a small amount of weight. I think I weigh around 67 kilos. I'm not sure. I can almost fit into that gorgeous dress (still don't know if I can wear it tomorrow), and I am feeling a bit more like myself.

I'm not crying about the friend that decided to take a break from me. It is not because I don't miss her, or feel bad about her decision, it is because I think she has made up her mind and there is nothing I can do to change it. Simple as that.

I feel that the psychologist is helping me and I look forward to making more headway as time goes on.

And I will let you know soon if I wear the dress or not. It is still a tad snug.

Comments

The Candid Bandit said…
Almost fitting into that gorgeous dress is the best damn motivation a girl needs I say!

I think I might need a 'gorgeous' something myself to inspire me.

Good to hear you in a softer place. You sound calmer, more peaceful. :-)
7:10 pm
Shannin said…
I'm keeping my fingers crossed that it fits. You are going to look beautiful! I'm glad the psych is helping. Sometimes getting an impartial sounding board can really help.
9:54 am
Marisa said…
I can't say it any more eloquently than Beckie!

I, myself, can't wait for you to post a picture of you in that dress, which I know will be soon.
5:09 am
Sooz said…
You sound great! I'm happy to read that you are in an ok place to claim this site for whatever you want it to be (screw anonymous!). Hang in there.
5:23 am
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