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Forgiveness Part 1

Where do I begin? I suppose at the beginning.

Why did I leave? What have I been doing? How goes the weight-loss? I am sure these are all questions you have if you followed any of the ramblings here. I will do my best to answer those, not just for your benefit, but for mine.

I have some days that are better than others, but mostly I feel like I am walking through a fog but it feels like cotton-balls. And everything hurts. Everything makes me cry. I can't understand why some days I'm so sad and full of anger on others. I can't understand why it still hurts so much.

Last week on the way home I decided to take the bus seat closest to the aisle because I only have a short ride and because it gets crowded I didn't want to be trapped when it came to my stop. I like a quick departure.

While still a few stops away from my home a man approached my seat and spoke to me asking if he could sit with me, I didn't exactly hear him because I had my ipod on, but I knew what he wanted. I moved aside for him to sit by the window and he said, thank you while I continued to stare at my lap and listen to my music.

I noticed that he was reading something and scribbling notes on it so I glanced over to have a peek at what he was reading. I saw it was some kind of workbook, the kind that has questions at the end to help you remember the lessons in the previous chapter and he was making extra notes in the margins even though he had answered all the questions. I was intrigued immediately.

At the top of the page in bold type, centered, was the title of the Chapter, "Forgiveness."

It seems that someone was trying to tell me something.

I once thought that I needed hatred in order to get over it, but I've come to realize that it is not hatred that I need, but what I do need is forgiveness.

Stay tuned for Part 2

Comments

Wenchy said…
Forgiving others is hard.. but I have found forgiving myself even harder.

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