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Work from the inside out

Every new year for most of my life has been about making new plans to lose weight. I make a pact, write a contract, buy a book, join a weight-loss club, or all of the above. I do it hard and I do it with gusto for at least 2-3 weeks before it starts to crack and fade.

I can't say I've never been successful with my attempts to lose weight, because that would be a lie. I've lost just over 30 kilos and actually kept it off.

I still have 5 kilos to lose before I'm in my normal weight bracket, and 10 before I will feel satisfied with myself. The past year has been a very difficult one in the life of ms. ralph. If you read here then I don't have to tell you about it.

Let's just say that I'm lucky I didn't gain back the 30 kilos and then some. I've faced a lot of crap and although I've been stuck somewhere between 66-69 kilos for the better part of the year, I consider myself very lucky.

I just read an entry written by Airlie, one of the most open and soul baring entries she has ever written. It has inspired me to remember an author that I fell in love with around 5 years ago, Geneen Roth. She is a legend in writing about emotional eating.

I eat because I like it. I eat because it makes me feel good. I eat because it is comforting. I eat because it tastes so good. I eat because I have a very strong emotional tie to it, one that is not easily broken.

I have forgotten for too long that I have to work on this from the inside out. I knew this, I've done it, but I need to do it again. I have to deal with the emotions, the things that cause me pain.

For example there is the so called friend I wrote about in the previous entry. She has really rocked my emotional world this past month and a half. You wouldn't think so, but her name comes up in every single psych appointment I have. She has caused a rift in my life. I'm mad, I'm sad, and I'm eating my feelings.

I hope if you suffer emotional eating like me you will also find an inspiration to help you through it. I highly recommend this author to you. Give it a go. You won't be sorry.

Comments

Anonymous said…
hey gorgeous girl! thank you so much for mentioning little old me. I actually think that you have been way successful in your journey, you have just hit what I like to call "speedbumps". Its like when you leave a shopping centre and you are driving and you see the exit and you start headinf for it and just when you feel like you are going to get through it, you have to slow down to go over a speed hump.

Your friend is a speedhump. She is bigger than normal speedhumps and you may have to approach her at a higher acceleration to get over her but she is still just a speedhump!

Here's to getting over those final speedhumps in 2006 hey?

ps - I am in adelaide next week to be with Mum for her chemo treatment - I would love to catch up and buy you a coffee?
Shannin said…
Thanks for the book recommendation. Now that I can't eat my feelings, I will need to find an alternate outlet.

I think 2005 has been a great success for your weight goal, and I continued to be inspired by you.
Denise said…
I actually went to a Geneen Roth seminar and it really changed my thinking in many, many ways. Highly recommend all of her books and, if you love cats like I do, most especially The Craggy Hole in My Heart and the Cat Who Fixed It. (DO NOT forget your Kleenex - you have been warned!)
Argy said…
My dearest dearest darling! (is this goodenglish now? ;)

For an emotional eater, going through what you went through emotionally this year, and still maintaining their almost to goal weight, is quite an achievement, and dont you dare tell yourself otherwise!

Getting rid of toxic people is a tough job indeed. And you did it! You have to realise your strength and use it!

Have a great New years eve, and a fantastic new year!

We'll be together in this till the end!!!
You are fabulous. In all ways possible..

I found this and thought of you the second it loaded! http://www.betseyjohnson.com/shop/shop.asp?Cid=1011

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