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This is heaven to no one else but me...

The last day of our Anna Stewart Memorial Project we were asked to create something to present to everyone that talked about our personal experience over the last 2 weeks. One of the suggestions was to write a poem. I decided to join that group, but as I was sitting there around the table with the others in my group I felt this enormous pressure to write and nothing was coming out. Everyone at the table of course remembered from earlier that I mentioned one of the things that I do in my spare time is um, write.

Yesterday on the bus I had to write. I had all these thoughts and feelings swirling around... I felt compelled and I didn't have a notebook but instead wrote on the back of something I had been carrying around in my bag.

Today? Nothing.

I had a very interesting session with R. this week. I felt like she did all of the talking. There was so much I wanted to say, but more importantly I did not want to hear her.

Although this week I have noticed that I have lost weight (don't know how much), she pointed out that emotionally it seems I am trying to sabotage myself.

Now why would I want to do that?

Because I am broken.

... to be continued.

Comments

Anonymous said…
heya sweety! I really feel like I have failed you. You are such a supportive and beautiful person and here I a stuck in bloody self obsession! anyhow, I am coming to Adelaide next weekend - are you up for a coffee?I might not have a lot of time, but I could definitely squeeze you in. ps - i have lost your phone number - please message me.
7:02 pm
Anonymous said…
i sabotage myself too. all the time. for a lot of reasons. i know what they are and have for a long time. but it's not easy to stop a bad habit.
1:28 am
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